In need of de-throning

These days I’m all consumed with potty training.

Ladybug gets up in the morning, we go to the potty.

We eat breakfast, we go to the potty.

I clean up the mess from breakfast, we go to the potty.

You get the picture.

But Ladybug doesn’t.

The fun area I created (see the “Potty Animal” entry below) may be coming back to bite me. I’m afraid it may be too fun because all Ladybug wants to do all day is sit on the potty.

The first few days, I really thought she was getting the hang of it, too. She was going five or six times a day, and occasionally telling me when she had to. Of course half those times I couldn’t do anything about it because we were driving or checking out at the grocery store, and the concept of “holding it” hasn’t sunk in yet. But at least she knew when she had to go.

Now I can’t tell when she really needs to use the potty and when she’s just trying to get attention. She’ll say “Potty!”, but when I take her in the bathroom, she’s more interested in playing with the toys I set up than accomplishing her mission. Then as soon as I put her Pull-Ups back on, the waterworks begin. “Potty!” she’ll say again, only to repeat the dry spell when she’s back on the toilet.

Today she only successfully used the potty once, and that was just by chance. But we sat there at least 10 times. Ten times multiplied by 20 minutes. That’s more than three hours on the throne. That’s enough time to cook a roast, for Pete’s sake!

I keep reminding myself that everyone eventually gets potty trained, but days like this make me feel like it’s going to take an eternity. Not to doubt my little Ladybug, but in my distress this afternoon I did have a fleeting vision of having to send her off to elementary school in diapers.

I think all those ammonia fumes are going to my head.